Sounding Like A Broken Record?

When growing up did you ever listen to your Mom or family member repeat the same thing over and over again and swear you would never become like that because everyone was getting tired of hearing it? Have you ever had a friend complain to you about the same personal situation OVER and OVER again but they never fix it? Now here's a bigger pickle...have you ever found yourself saying the SAME THING over and over again and getting no resolve and a week later there you are pitching this same old rant again? How do you think the people around you feel listening to this broken record? How do you feel about yourself when you launch into the same shpeel?... AGAIN?

I've been trapped in this cyle when things are not going well. In fact, I can remember saying to my close friends, "I'm so sorry, I am SO tired of hearing these same words coming out of my mouth again." Good friends WILL hang in there for a while, but don't overstay your welcome in this territory. It's a slippery slope.

Here's an interesting fact I read in one of my favorite books. Karen Kingston shares in her life-altering book (for me anyway) "Clearing Your Clutter with Feng Shui", a startling piece of information. "Psychologists estimate that the average person has about 60,000 thoughts per day. Unfortunately 95 percent of those thoughts are exactly the same as the thoughts you had yesterday. And these are the same thoughts you had yesterday." And so on...

No wonder we keep having the same conversations and thinking about the same topics over and over again. All our thoughts are just recycled thoughts of the day before! This is sad to me. In a world filled with so much information, thoughts, passions, ideas...why do we stay focused on the same thing day in and day out?

I'm all about keeping things simple, believe me, but we MUST explore further than these stale everyday thoughts. This is something I try to do regularly. New ideas are important to me. Hopefully you can be reading my blog and have new realizations every single week. It's vital to expanding our minds and understanding others better if we challenge ourselves to push a little further and dig a little deeper. There's so much more to learn and enjoy in this life!

Circling back to this broken record theory...consider the following:

1) If you are in a romantic relationship, hearing the same BS over and over again gets annoying...yeah I said it. I've been on both ends of this. I've been the one listening to the same crap until my ears bleed, and I've also been the broken record. Part of keeping a relationship fresh and meaningful is growing and helping your loved one grow. Want some more respect in your relationship? Think outside the box and get their mind going. Bring up new topics...get their opinion on things they are interested in. This will rejuvenate your dialogue. Wouldn't you rather have captivating conversation that stimulates you over listening to your man or woman go on and on about how you didn't take out the trash AGAIN or how bored they are etc? I'm going to venture to say same ol' same ol'=GETS OLD.

2) Friendships are gifts. If you are lucky enough to get a true friend in this lifetime you will discover that they will listen to you through breakup #27, through drunken escapades where you completely go over the line, through tears and anger that shake you to your core, through depressions, through successes...through it ALL! This does not give you a free pass to dump on this person all your life never learning and repeating the same crap into your 40s. Don't get me wrong, some will be there to pick you up everytime you fall off the horse, but this can get old as well. Again, while there are no expiration dates on friendships, learn from your mistakes and then try to do better next time.

3) Getting sick of your own voice is one of the worst feelings in the world. Hearing the same stories over and over and finding yourself reliving the same old bad feelings is not productive. It's emotionally poisonous to you and all of those around you. The past is the past. Learn to let go. Stop torturing yourself with the same repetitive tape of how you were hurt. Talk it out a time or two (or three) and then forgive yourself or whoever hurt you and move forward. (And if you cannot do this, find a therapist that is truly qualified to help you because it's important to find a healthy way to heal.) The past is the past and you can never change what happened. All you can do is learn from these experiences and move forward to make better choices in your future.

So, are you a sounding like a broken record? Change up your tape and start saying new words. Start thinking new thoughts. Start exploring new avenues of conversation that will enhance your soul and encourage all of those around you to stop the cyle.

Enjoy your new life and new quality of relationships when you begin this new path!

Have a wonderful week everyone!

Opening Doors...(and getting excited to close some too!)

“When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.” -Joseph Campbell

It's easy to waste time staring at closed doors. Right? You lose a relationship. You're heartbroken. You lose your job. You shutdown. You lose your confidence. You can't get the courage to make your next move. You might even become paralyzed with fear? You end up sitting so long in the same helpless position that you can't move forward. You're in "idle" mode. You can't pop your car into drive, so to speak.

So, sure some doors have closed. But what about the open ones just waiting for you walk through them? Or atleast acknowledge that they are there? It might be time to open your eyes and see these opportunities that are wide open. Open your ears to hear the truth and not block out what actually could be for you and your future.

DOORS CLOSE FOR A REASON
Oh so cliche! Everything happens for a reason. "Okay Kate...I've heard this one a million times. Is this just what people say after they make bad decisions to make themselves feel better?" ...the answer is NO! This is what I believe....

I believe that MISTAKES ARE CRUCIAL. Mistakes are necessary. We cannot know how to do everything right the first time. There is no way for us all to know the right thing for us the first time...everytime. Sometimes we THINK we know what we want, then when we get it, we realize this isn't what we wanted at all. Sometimes we THINK we need something, and then when it is ours, we realize we never actually needed it...ever. Our perception to this point is ONLY as deep as our current experiences.

When a door closes, don't jump to the immediate conclusion that this is a bad thing. I believe some doors have to close in order for us to grow. But fear not! When one door closes, look for the next open one...or maybe even a window? It might not look like what you thought it would. Opportunities come into your life when it is the right timing. Have faith in this. Do not doubt that there is divine plan for everyone. There IS. And I believe that when you walk through the right door, your soul is at peace. Everything feels just a little smoother. You feel like you are in the right place...and that is because you ARE.

HOW DO I FIND THE RIGHT DOOR?

1) Trial and error. Like I said before. You aren't going to make the right decision 100% of the time. BE GRATEFUL FOR THIS FACT. Without your "mistakes", you would never find what you don't need. You will find that these "mistakes" may no longer be able to be catergorized as "mistakes"...you may find that they are blessings.

2) Follow your passion (what gets you excited everyday?) This might not be something you are able to do everyday at first, but it's a good place to start. Take a little time to think about what brings a smile to your face. What makes you look forward to getting up everyday? What kind of work could you do that wouldn't feel like "work" that perhaps you can do to make this world a better place? All of these things makes you the person that you are. These are the things to increase in your life so that we all experience the true essence of "you". Your life wasted doing things you positively hate demands that you look as your life as one big closed door with no options...and that simply is not the case.

3) Make an effort. This involves you taking the time to explore what opportunities you want to experience in this life. You might have to go outside of your comfort zone and have a conversation with someone you normally wouldn't? You might have to meet new people that show you a new path? You might not have to leave your home, but find that quiet time where you can reflect, meditate, read, or daydream to get in touch with yourself and in tune with who you are and what you truly want your life to be. However you get there is YOUR journey and it will be different for every single person reading this. Find YOUR way. There is no wrong way.

Have confidence that you will find your open doors. In fact, there may be a strong wind at this very moment trying to blow you through this door at this VERY MOMENT and you are ignoring it due to fear, unawareness, or the inability to see. Open your eyes. Open your heart. Let the wind take you. Remember there are no mistakes. Only blessings...

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MAMAS AND CAREGIVERS THAT MAKE OUR WORLD A BETTER PLACE.
xoxo

Moments That Matter

I couldn't let this weekend go by without sharing the realization of acknowledging beautiful moments in life when they happen. Moments that matter...

This weekend we were blessed to be with our family to celebrate the graduation of my cousin and her lovely boyfriend. We got to spend the whole day together at a beautiful home, out on the water...it was breathtaking.

The image I keep reliving is being on the back of the boat...wind whipping through my air as the boat accelerated...radio blaring All Summer Long by Kid Rock..."drinkin whiskey out the bottle...not thinkin 'bout tomorrow...singing Sweet Home Alabama, all summer long..." My brother on my right, my husband on my left...out in the middle of a lake soaring through the waters...looking ahead and seeing my three beautiful cousins, my aunt, uncle and mother smiling and enjoying the moment all together on this boat...out in the middle of nowhere...sun shining...not a care in the world.

Back at the house we ate food, dipped our toes in the pool, played games together, and caught up on all we could. This is the first time we met my cousin's boyfriend's family and it felt like we'd known them forever. They were so welcoming that we all already felt like family. We laughed all day long. Lots of hugs, lots of talk about our future arrival of our newest family member (our baby Kaden)...lots of reminiscing about the births of the cousins and growing up together.

The night ended with all of us out at the very end of the dock under the stars. The cool Spring breeze was refreshing and exhilerating. Our last endeavor was getting my Mom to make her first smore ever by the bonfire! It was a great way to end the day.

Sometimes we get so busy with life that we don't take the time to spend the time with those that make us the happiest. Sometimes we get too caught up in work, worries, and everyday stress. Taking a day to unwind, get outside and take in the scenery can really do a mind and body good. Don't let too much time pass caught up in the wrong things to exert your energy towards...refocus to the things that matter...the moments that matter.

Mission for the week:
1) Contact someone that brings you joy. Either ask them to get coffee, make a phone call, or even a purposeful text to let them know that they matter to you.
2) Get outside. Even if it's for FIVE minutes...I know you can find five minutes in your week...take in the sun, walk in the grass, stare at the stars...feel connected. Know that you are part of something amazing.

That's all for this week friends. Discover a moment that matters...