Start Your Day by Choosing Joy

Joy could be the norm for each of us if we re-train ourselves to focus on the joys in life instead of our perceived woes. We all can uncover the daily joys in our day to day if we train ourselves to recognize them, honor them and as a result, will experience MORE!

Step 1:
Decide to choose joy.
When I wake up in the morning, I can choose to experience frustration, exhaustion, and anger when I have not gotten enough sleep, when I think about all I have to do today, and when I start listing all my perceived hurdles of what is going to happen in the next 8-10 hours. OR I can wake up and choose to be joyful because first of all, I'm blessed with another day on this earth, I have a beautiful son to hold and smile at me first thing when I rise, and I have coffee waiting for me as soon as I brew it!  See the difference? If you choose to focus on your sources of joy, your whole day can chance in a matter of seconds once you decide what you want to see.

Step 2:
Be the example.
Next, make it a goal to bring joy to the first person you see when you start your day. (Mine of course is my baby boy, and that is easy with a smile and some snuggles, he is immediately happy.) I'm talking more about the next adult you see. It's SO easy to immediately start complaining about SOMETHING. (My first inclination EVERYDAY is to complain to my friend who watches my son while I'm at work because more than likely, it was a rough night's sleep, or I get that dipping feeling of sadness just as I'm leaving my baby to head to work.) If I walk in to her house and immediately launch into negative talk, do you think she's going to feel energized? Do you think she's going to feel joy when I'm with her first thing every morning if all I do is vent? Absolutely not. Now there is definitely a time and place to vent, but first thing in the morning is a choice. If you choose that negative conversation, that is how both of your days will begin. Instead, try bringing a new, more vitalized energy into that space. Whether it's a family member, a friend, or your workplace, try starting with a positive message such as, "Wow, it's a beautiful morning," or "I'm so ready to tackle that project today," a simple "I love your outfit," or even a heartfelt "Good morning" with a big smile can go a long way and get the positive, joyous vibe moving in both of your directions. Give it a try. Let the first things that come out of your mouth be intended for positive movement in your day. Words are very important and so is the energy in which you present your thoughts.

Step 3:
Refocus when you find yourself on the dark side.
Okay, you woke up and chose joy. Your first encounter was a positive one. Here we are an hour later and you get an angry phone call from a customer, friend or family member that completely steals all your joy and brings you to a very negative state. This IS going to happen A LOT. You are constantly challenged with moments and events of conflict that could easily send you into a downward spiral. But not YOU. Not you today, anyway. Instead, recognize your dark thoughts. Take a few long deep breaths and acknowledge that this has changed your energy to an unproductive state. Then start to refocus your thoughts onto an image that softens you. (My best example is my son's face. In fact, my phone is loaded with images and videos of him, just in case I need a reminder on where I can find instant joy.) Take a few minutes to reclaim that inner state of joy by that image or thought. Let yourself breathe and smile back through the entrance of your inner peace. Once again, choose joy.

I hope these tips are helpful to you.

May joy fill you and be replenished throughout your day once you make that decision....

Sincerely,
Katherine Leigh

Finding Emotional and Spiritual Freedom

After many years of feeling chained to things I don't want to be chained to, I've come up with a list of ways to set yourself free on a daily basis that will clear up your head, your conscience, and your heart. Do I do all of these 100% of the time? Of course not. I'm human. We all fall into unhealthy patterns and behaviors. In my experience, here are ways to increase your freedom emotionally and spiritually to add joy to your daily being.

1. Stop Gossipping
Yeah, this is a hard one, because it's oh, so tempting to catch up on the latest and spill your guts especially if it's REALLY JUICY! (Did you hear who Jenny hooked UP WITH?) It can be totally tempting to unload all you know once the ball starts rolling in the gossip lane. The truth is, this sets you up to say something hurtful that could possibly get back to someone you care about or an innocent person, if given bad information. Then you must begin defending yourself or making excuses (waste of your time) as to why you were talking about this person if it gets back to them. Even if it doesn't get back to them, those around you will remember that you talk about other people and therefore, stop sharing private information with you. Instead of jumping on this bandwagon, next time try changing the topic, walking away or simply say you have nothing against this person and rather not talk about them. Which leads me to...

2. Defend the person not present.
It's SO easy to pile on the person unable to defend their actions or words when there is a group of people talking about them behind their back. Next time everyone is hating on Evan, stand up for him when he has no voice and suggest perhaps there is more to the story than we know. We shouldn't make a judgement call when we only know half of the story.

3. Don't lie
Period. When you don't lie, you don't ever have to endure the discomforts of living a lie, participating in a lie, or covering up your lies. When you come from a place of truth, your conscience is free. Perhaps you don't always say exactly the right thing or take the best action, but at least it comes from an honest place. People who lie are constantly working double time to remember their lies and act accordingly. It's exhausting and a waste of your energy.

4. Do it right now
Not later. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Take care of it now. Get it off of your plate. Procrastination can poison your present joy by obsessing about what you have to do later. Why not bang it out right now and get it over with? Get if off your to-do list if it's important. Stop putting it aside if it's something you can conquer with ease, especially if it is a nagging task.
You will feel so much better once that item is off of your mind for good.

5. Stop asking for opinions from others
This one is hard for the people pleasers and the indecisive. The truth is...ONLY YOU know what is best for you. ONLY YOU know what is best for your life. Don't let others dictate your decisions. This will result in you living out other people's desires and wants, which may not be applicable to your life's goals, ambitions, or needs whatsoever. Listen to YOU. Listen to that voice inside. Get quiet. Listen for it. Don't spend your time pleasing others and being miserable. All of the answers you seek are in you. Stop looking for the answers elsewhere.

When you free up your conscience, heart and mind, you have time to focus on the things that really matter. That kind of freedom is priceless.

Enjoy your freedom.

Sincerely,
Katherine Leigh

Sounding Like A Broken Record?

When growing up did you ever listen to your Mom or family member repeat the same thing over and over again and swear you would never become like that because everyone was getting tired of hearing it? Have you ever had a friend complain to you about the same personal situation OVER and OVER again but they never fix it? Now here's a bigger pickle...have you ever found yourself saying the SAME THING over and over again and getting no resolve and a week later there you are pitching this same old rant again? How do you think the people around you feel listening to this broken record? How do you feel about yourself when you launch into the same shpeel?... AGAIN?

I've been trapped in this cyle when things are not going well. In fact, I can remember saying to my close friends, "I'm so sorry, I am SO tired of hearing these same words coming out of my mouth again." Good friends WILL hang in there for a while, but don't overstay your welcome in this territory. It's a slippery slope.

Here's an interesting fact I read in one of my favorite books. Karen Kingston shares in her life-altering book (for me anyway) "Clearing Your Clutter with Feng Shui", a startling piece of information. "Psychologists estimate that the average person has about 60,000 thoughts per day. Unfortunately 95 percent of those thoughts are exactly the same as the thoughts you had yesterday. And these are the same thoughts you had yesterday." And so on...

No wonder we keep having the same conversations and thinking about the same topics over and over again. All our thoughts are just recycled thoughts of the day before! This is sad to me. In a world filled with so much information, thoughts, passions, ideas...why do we stay focused on the same thing day in and day out?

I'm all about keeping things simple, believe me, but we MUST explore further than these stale everyday thoughts. This is something I try to do regularly. New ideas are important to me. Hopefully you can be reading my blog and have new realizations every single week. It's vital to expanding our minds and understanding others better if we challenge ourselves to push a little further and dig a little deeper. There's so much more to learn and enjoy in this life!

Circling back to this broken record theory...consider the following:

1) If you are in a romantic relationship, hearing the same BS over and over again gets annoying...yeah I said it. I've been on both ends of this. I've been the one listening to the same crap until my ears bleed, and I've also been the broken record. Part of keeping a relationship fresh and meaningful is growing and helping your loved one grow. Want some more respect in your relationship? Think outside the box and get their mind going. Bring up new topics...get their opinion on things they are interested in. This will rejuvenate your dialogue. Wouldn't you rather have captivating conversation that stimulates you over listening to your man or woman go on and on about how you didn't take out the trash AGAIN or how bored they are etc? I'm going to venture to say same ol' same ol'=GETS OLD.

2) Friendships are gifts. If you are lucky enough to get a true friend in this lifetime you will discover that they will listen to you through breakup #27, through drunken escapades where you completely go over the line, through tears and anger that shake you to your core, through depressions, through successes...through it ALL! This does not give you a free pass to dump on this person all your life never learning and repeating the same crap into your 40s. Don't get me wrong, some will be there to pick you up everytime you fall off the horse, but this can get old as well. Again, while there are no expiration dates on friendships, learn from your mistakes and then try to do better next time.

3) Getting sick of your own voice is one of the worst feelings in the world. Hearing the same stories over and over and finding yourself reliving the same old bad feelings is not productive. It's emotionally poisonous to you and all of those around you. The past is the past. Learn to let go. Stop torturing yourself with the same repetitive tape of how you were hurt. Talk it out a time or two (or three) and then forgive yourself or whoever hurt you and move forward. (And if you cannot do this, find a therapist that is truly qualified to help you because it's important to find a healthy way to heal.) The past is the past and you can never change what happened. All you can do is learn from these experiences and move forward to make better choices in your future.

So, are you a sounding like a broken record? Change up your tape and start saying new words. Start thinking new thoughts. Start exploring new avenues of conversation that will enhance your soul and encourage all of those around you to stop the cyle.

Enjoy your new life and new quality of relationships when you begin this new path!

Have a wonderful week everyone!

Opening Doors...(and getting excited to close some too!)

“When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.” -Joseph Campbell

It's easy to waste time staring at closed doors. Right? You lose a relationship. You're heartbroken. You lose your job. You shutdown. You lose your confidence. You can't get the courage to make your next move. You might even become paralyzed with fear? You end up sitting so long in the same helpless position that you can't move forward. You're in "idle" mode. You can't pop your car into drive, so to speak.

So, sure some doors have closed. But what about the open ones just waiting for you walk through them? Or atleast acknowledge that they are there? It might be time to open your eyes and see these opportunities that are wide open. Open your ears to hear the truth and not block out what actually could be for you and your future.

DOORS CLOSE FOR A REASON
Oh so cliche! Everything happens for a reason. "Okay Kate...I've heard this one a million times. Is this just what people say after they make bad decisions to make themselves feel better?" ...the answer is NO! This is what I believe....

I believe that MISTAKES ARE CRUCIAL. Mistakes are necessary. We cannot know how to do everything right the first time. There is no way for us all to know the right thing for us the first time...everytime. Sometimes we THINK we know what we want, then when we get it, we realize this isn't what we wanted at all. Sometimes we THINK we need something, and then when it is ours, we realize we never actually needed it...ever. Our perception to this point is ONLY as deep as our current experiences.

When a door closes, don't jump to the immediate conclusion that this is a bad thing. I believe some doors have to close in order for us to grow. But fear not! When one door closes, look for the next open one...or maybe even a window? It might not look like what you thought it would. Opportunities come into your life when it is the right timing. Have faith in this. Do not doubt that there is divine plan for everyone. There IS. And I believe that when you walk through the right door, your soul is at peace. Everything feels just a little smoother. You feel like you are in the right place...and that is because you ARE.

HOW DO I FIND THE RIGHT DOOR?

1) Trial and error. Like I said before. You aren't going to make the right decision 100% of the time. BE GRATEFUL FOR THIS FACT. Without your "mistakes", you would never find what you don't need. You will find that these "mistakes" may no longer be able to be catergorized as "mistakes"...you may find that they are blessings.

2) Follow your passion (what gets you excited everyday?) This might not be something you are able to do everyday at first, but it's a good place to start. Take a little time to think about what brings a smile to your face. What makes you look forward to getting up everyday? What kind of work could you do that wouldn't feel like "work" that perhaps you can do to make this world a better place? All of these things makes you the person that you are. These are the things to increase in your life so that we all experience the true essence of "you". Your life wasted doing things you positively hate demands that you look as your life as one big closed door with no options...and that simply is not the case.

3) Make an effort. This involves you taking the time to explore what opportunities you want to experience in this life. You might have to go outside of your comfort zone and have a conversation with someone you normally wouldn't? You might have to meet new people that show you a new path? You might not have to leave your home, but find that quiet time where you can reflect, meditate, read, or daydream to get in touch with yourself and in tune with who you are and what you truly want your life to be. However you get there is YOUR journey and it will be different for every single person reading this. Find YOUR way. There is no wrong way.

Have confidence that you will find your open doors. In fact, there may be a strong wind at this very moment trying to blow you through this door at this VERY MOMENT and you are ignoring it due to fear, unawareness, or the inability to see. Open your eyes. Open your heart. Let the wind take you. Remember there are no mistakes. Only blessings...

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MAMAS AND CAREGIVERS THAT MAKE OUR WORLD A BETTER PLACE.
xoxo

Moments That Matter

I couldn't let this weekend go by without sharing the realization of acknowledging beautiful moments in life when they happen. Moments that matter...

This weekend we were blessed to be with our family to celebrate the graduation of my cousin and her lovely boyfriend. We got to spend the whole day together at a beautiful home, out on the water...it was breathtaking.

The image I keep reliving is being on the back of the boat...wind whipping through my air as the boat accelerated...radio blaring All Summer Long by Kid Rock..."drinkin whiskey out the bottle...not thinkin 'bout tomorrow...singing Sweet Home Alabama, all summer long..." My brother on my right, my husband on my left...out in the middle of a lake soaring through the waters...looking ahead and seeing my three beautiful cousins, my aunt, uncle and mother smiling and enjoying the moment all together on this boat...out in the middle of nowhere...sun shining...not a care in the world.

Back at the house we ate food, dipped our toes in the pool, played games together, and caught up on all we could. This is the first time we met my cousin's boyfriend's family and it felt like we'd known them forever. They were so welcoming that we all already felt like family. We laughed all day long. Lots of hugs, lots of talk about our future arrival of our newest family member (our baby Kaden)...lots of reminiscing about the births of the cousins and growing up together.

The night ended with all of us out at the very end of the dock under the stars. The cool Spring breeze was refreshing and exhilerating. Our last endeavor was getting my Mom to make her first smore ever by the bonfire! It was a great way to end the day.

Sometimes we get so busy with life that we don't take the time to spend the time with those that make us the happiest. Sometimes we get too caught up in work, worries, and everyday stress. Taking a day to unwind, get outside and take in the scenery can really do a mind and body good. Don't let too much time pass caught up in the wrong things to exert your energy towards...refocus to the things that matter...the moments that matter.

Mission for the week:
1) Contact someone that brings you joy. Either ask them to get coffee, make a phone call, or even a purposeful text to let them know that they matter to you.
2) Get outside. Even if it's for FIVE minutes...I know you can find five minutes in your week...take in the sun, walk in the grass, stare at the stars...feel connected. Know that you are part of something amazing.

That's all for this week friends. Discover a moment that matters...

What Others Think of you is None of Your Business?

One thing that you might not know about me is that I am constantly looking for quotes, concepts, spirtual realizations and ways to think about life that makes sense to me. I see so much go on in this world that I believe is wasted energy on things that are not important. I fully realize that what is super important to me may have no significance in your life and vice versa. This is not a bad thing. We all have to find what moves, motivates, and keeps us going. Every single one of us has our own path. I'm learning that my job is NOT to judge other people's ways, but to focus more on my own path. My own journey is not the priority of anyone else but me.

I am always keeping my eyes and ears open for one liners, stories, or even photos that will spark a connection with me to help simplify, direct, or guide me in the right direction. Sometimes when a thought really resonates with you, your whole world changes...maybe not all at once, but slowly chips away at misconceptions you once had if you are open to hearing a new truth. Here are three quotes that have come into my life that make me think twice about how I once viewed the world.

"Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate."

Why not focus and stengthen things that are good in this world? Why not let everyone know what is working for you and what makes brings you joy opposed to putting out your hater vibe and sounding nasty and resentful of things that you don't value? Instead of posting things about what you despise, why not try the other way and focus on the people or events that make this world a pleasure to be in? Give it a try.

"Those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind."

Genius! People that are offended by you all the time...people that constantly tell you that you aren't good enough and that you need to be this and that (anything other than who you truly are) can go kick rocks! Get out of here. STOP LETTING THESE PEOPLE DICTATE your life! They love telling you how amazing they are and how terrible you are. Why are you letting these people into your life anyway? Do they lift you up? Do they see the best in you? NO! They complain all the time about their lives and suck you dry. Stop catering to these people who make you feel bad. Turn to TRUE friends who love and accept you just the way you. In return, be a true friend to those who are good to you and bring joy and value to your relationship. Those that matter (those that love and respect you) will still be there if you spend your time on them and not those that are complicating and poisoning your spirit.

"What others think of you is none of your business."


WHAT? Have you ever heard something more refreshing in your life? What others think of me is none of my business? How much time would I save if I could believe these words? Just let them think what they want and not worry about how they percieve me? Because it's NONE of my business? This is just a delicious concept that I want to savor and I'm trying every single day to take this to heart and accept that it just might be true? People are going to come to their own conclusions no matter what the truth is. In the end, you have to be true to yourself and know that even though what they believe may be false, it is not your responsibility to fix their view on you. If you are living in your truth then live there and do not fret about how others view you. Be confident in your truth.


I hope these quotes spark a moment of excitement in each of you who ready this entry. You never know where you will find inspiration, clarity or understanding in this crazy life we live. Stay joyful, grateful, and don't forget to keep loving others. Have a wonderful week everyone!

What are you thankful for?

Here is my list for today:
1. The beautiful baby living within me.

2. My loving husband who is there with me every step of the way.

3. My family and close friends who support me, check on me, and get excited with me about our new family member arriving in August.

4. My two cats who make me giggle and give me comfort every single day.

5. Naps.

6. Bubble baths.

7. Grace given to me despite all circumstances. (Thank you God!)

8. Oprah Winfrey for bringing us Super Soul Sundays every week. It really feeds my soul and spiritual curiosity.

9. Random sources of inspiration that bring me joy and strength.

10. Hope, Excitement, and Love without which this life wouldn't be all that it is:)

What are you thankful for?